I'M THE MOMMY - THAT'S WHY: So, so gross

Monday, 8 September 2008

So, so gross

Disclaimer: Do not read this post if you have small children. Seriously, it's contagious. I caught it from Cristin.

I went to get Finn up from his nap today.

The smell hit me first.

He'd taken off his socks, pants, and diaper.

He'd poo'd.

He'd smeared it EVERYWHERE.

He dropped the remaining turds through the slats onto the floor, and then apparently PEEDLED on them.

He'd even covered his bottle with poo.

It was gross.

Luckily, I know how to handle this, because his sisters were MASTERS of the poo-portrait.

Baby wipes - not just for tushies.

It took two baths to return him to white again.

I'm calling BumGenius and suggesting a chastity diaper...

Be glad my camera is busted.

1 comment:

Kim said...: OMG. I'm waiting for the day when Devin discovers that his diaper can be removed by him. I hope it never comes. However, it was nice to have an idea of what to do in case it does happen. (Please God, don't let it happen to me!)

You're a better woman than I, Kira!; 9 September 2008 at 13:03

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100(ish) Things About ME

Funniest thing EVER: "You're not a cookie!"
I can only eat Tic Tacs in pairs. Tic Tacs come packaged in odd numbers. Ergo, somewhere there are packages and packages with one lonely Tic Tac in them sitting in a landfil.
I hope to one day foster/adopt child(ren). I think it's one of the most noble causes.
If the hours didn't suck, I'd be a nurse.
I don't believe anything is ever final.
I actually love my job.
I have issues with toe hair. This means YOU, hubby.
If there were such a thing as finger-lengthening surgery, I think I'd get it.
I'm short - only 5'.
Lavender gives me migraines.
I have a black thumb, and if I so much as look at plants they die.
I've always been a little bit dissapointed that I didn't get the wedding dress I REALLY wanted. :(
My hands and feet are ALWAYS cold. My hubby says it's because my cold cold heart is leaking. ;)
I have chronically dry skin.
I have been writing my first childrens book for, oh, about six years now. I don't even have a title yet. (I DO have a plot.)
Even though our national sport is Lacrosse, I have no idea how to play nor any inclination to learn.
I don't like blueberries.
I don't share well.
I'm addicted to F*R*I*E*N*D*S, and have a daughter named Rachel. Coincidence?
I collect Ball Gowns. LOOOOVE them. The poofier the better!
I've never owned a poncho.
I won't tell your heart, your achy-breaky heart.
I hardly ever sweat the petty things, and I NEVER pet the sweaty things.
I heart shoes.
I'm finding it harder that I thought it would be to come up with 100 different things about myself.
I'm a pepsi addict, thanks to my hubby. Thanks, hubby. ;)
I suck at math.
I do my best thinking at around 2am.
I lie about my natural haircolour. I'm a redhead. Ok, OK, I'm brown. Not a brunette, just brown. Like poo. And rodents. And the colour orange-juice turns when you spill it and it goes under your fridge and then you leave it for two years... (Trust me on that one.) My natural shade of brown only looks good on mud and re-fried beans. God bless Ms. Clairol.
I'm Canadian, eh?
I have absolutely no idea what I'm doing. But I'm wearing a fabulous new outfit.

Cast Of Characters

*Kira - Your not-so-average mommy-blogger. Young, "sometimes-single mom" to 3. Currently SAHM due to Canada's rocking Mat leave policies. Protagonist. Your humble narrator.
Andrew - Husband. Father. Sometime blogger. Soldier. Mouthpiece.
Finnigan - Youngest boy-child to Kira, Andrew, Kevin. Brother. Sometime pet. Tie that binds. Baby.
June Mommas - Fellow members of BabyCenter's June 2007 baby boards. Support system. Friends.
Kevin - Long story. Bio-dad to Finnigan. Co-worker to Kira.
Lillian - First born daughter to Kira and Andrew. Stick. Miss Sensitivity. Kira's Mini-Me. First-grader. Little momma.
Rachel - Second born daughter to Kira and Andrew. Duck-lover. Drama queen. El Destructo. Miss Attitude. Kindergartener. 5-going-on-15.
Troll - The resident antagonist to your humble narrator. See post "The Good, The Bad, The June. ;)" Verisifier.