Stupid trees

We've hit a bit of a cold jag here, so I brought in my prissy little decorative fig/ficus benjamina trees inside. I think they're mad at me now. I think that outside, they felt like real trees. Birds landed on them, squirrels buried peanuts at their roots, the wind gently ruffled their leaves. Now my diva trees are giving me attitude. I turned the heat off completely and stuck them both by (poorly sealed) windows to help them acclimate, but they're still dropping leaves like tears. I watered them the night before I brought them in, and have been pretty much ignoring them since, aside from picking up dropped foliage before Finn eats it. Stupid trees. Anyone know what the want? Outside is not an option. They are small and weak and dramatic. They're a lot like the girls. Finn is short but solid, like the Monkey Puzzle tree that remains on the balcony. That tree is tough and stubborn. I forgot to water it for like a month (uhhh, I mean no I didn't. Really honey, I take care of your tree...) and it actually grew. This is my kind of tree. I don't like high-maintenance trees like the Diva Duo. There are already enough divas in this house.

Anybody know what I can do for these stupid trees that's more effective than shooting rubber bands at them? Because while that is fun, I know I'll just have to go pick them all up...