AARRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!

*SCREAM*

Ok. I'm ok now. Glad I got that out.

Do you think I can petition God for shorter days? Or maybe just less waking hours for those under the age of 21? That'd be great. Hellions #1 and #2 were ALL. UP. in my face today. School is not long enough. Not by half. They destroyed the house - the house that was so spectacularly pristine when we returned from our trip. The house I spent hours pristine-ifying before we left, so that it would be so lovely to come home to. Destroyed. I wanted to take pictures for you all to show you, but my camera is missing among the wreckage. Six minutes to bedtime, and then I can begin to move mountains. If I don't post for a while, send a search party out, k?

Hellion #3 is on my last nerve. He is into EVERYTHING. He's just so. busy. He goes into drawers in the kitchen and scatters utensils everywhere. Then he picks things out of the "dirt pile" from my sweeping efforts and eats them. Then I have to figure out what they were, and whether or not it warrants a trip to the ER. No sooner do I get the sweepings into the garbage, then he's pushing buttons on my computer and doing who knows what. He makes my keyboard go into Spanish mode, and I still don't know how to fix that aside from smashing my open hand on it like he does until I hit the magical mystical combination that makes it all better. While I'm sorting that out, he's back to the drawer. Then the bottles for recycling, setting them up so that when I open that cupboard later, they all come cascading out like a waterfall. He will not stop stealing my lipgloss. He loves it. What a freak. I can't even pen him in, because he knows how to climb now. He stacks his toys up in his cage playpen and "falls" out. He knows how to get out of his highchair even if I strap him in! To make it all worse, when I FINALLY got a cup of coffee today, he got into that and dumped it all over himself and the floor. Obviously, it was cold - I haven't had a hot cup of coffee since '99. I think he did that last one just for spite. He's just so damn FAST! I don't remember the girls being this fast. This one needs a long yard and a zip line.

Honey, find us a house with a rubber room, k? The Mommy is going to need one.

k?thxbai.