Baby Products That Need Inventing.

1. A walker with a built-in vaccume. This way A.) baby is not creating trails of sweet-potato puffs everwhere he goes, and B.) baby actually improves his environment! It will be like a baby-propelled Roomba. Genius.
2. Whine-cancellation device. Like noise-cancelling headphones, except the size of my house. a baby "mute" button would work too.
3. An Easy-Change crib bumper set. These things are SUCH a PITA to get on and off. Apparently it's easier if you are 7 months old.
4. A vibrating crib. why is it that they have all these newborn beds with a million bells and whistles, but then you have to transfer LO to a crib that's just... a crib? Where's the vibration? Where's the gentle, soothing rocking motion?
5. Baby mouth guards. Not for baby, but for mommy! Those little white chicklets are SHARP.

If I were a little better at following through with these things, I could be RICH.